Are you turning into Victor Meldrew?
Let’s be frank here now; isn’t it great to be grumpy and have a bloomin’ good moan now and again? Whether it’s to do with the state of the nation, the cost of living or the way the neighbour continually parks his car across your driveway? Surely, it’s one of the privileges of getting older!
However, if you or indeed a friend or loved-one is becoming more and more negative – and the moaning is pretty much constant, this can have an impact on both physical and mental health.
What’s behind it?
There can be some very understandable reasons why certain older people can become almost chronically negative, and, for the sake of their overall well-being, it can make very good sense to try and pinpoint why this is happening – there could be a whole host of reasons, including:
- Physical pain and/or disabilities
- Money worries
- Loss of a loved one near their own age, such as a spouse, sibling or close friend
- Feelings of neglect from family members
- Problems understanding and handling an ever-changing world, not least new technologies
- Fear of what will happen to them if they lose their independence, and being “carted off to an old folk’s home”
- Onset of dementia
- Social isolation
- Loss or diminishment of one of the senses – not least sight or hearing
- Being seen as a ‘has-been’ rather than a sentient individual; feeling invisible
Diminishing the inner Victor
As scientific research indicates – not least from the world respected Mayo Clinic in the US – having a more positive outlook on life can make a real difference to our overall health and well-being, and even our life span. With this in mind, here are some suggestions to help you or someone close to you feel more upbeat…and less moany.
– Empathy and listening: Sometimes, people just need someone to listen to their concerns and frustrations – someone who can show empathy and be patient when they express their feelings.
– Social activities: Isolation can be a major contributor to feelings of negativity. So engaging in regular social activities with friends, family, or joining local community groups help immeasurably to stay connected and active.
– Physical activity: Regular exercise appropriate to age and physical condition – such as walking, yoga or swimming – can greatly improve mood and overall health. Not least if it is undertaken in a group or with a friend.
– Counting your blessings: Old-fashioned term it may be, but focussing on the positive aspects of life – and being grateful for them – will help make each day that bit brighter.
– Hobbies and interests: Pursuing a hobby or interest you actively enjoy can be a major distraction from any negative thoughts.
– Professional help: If profound negativity looks to be a symptom of underlying emotional or mental health issues, a professionally qualified therapist or counsellor can provide guidance and support.
– Physical health: Sometimes, physical health issues can contribute to negative feelings. Hardly surprising if, for instance, you’re in constant pain or struggling with mobility. So stay on top of those regular check-ups to get any appropriate medical care.
– News detox: Not for everyone, but cutting back – or even cutting out – exposure to news media can make you feel far more positive about life. Especially if you settle back with a really great book instead!
– Mindfulness and meditation: Whilst for some, this might sound a little bit hippy-dippy, mindfulness practices and meditation can really help reduce stress and promote a more positive outlook on life.
– Financial support: If the moans and groans are based on money worries, you may well be entitled to such things as Pension Credit, Housing Benefit, a reduction in your council tax, Attendance Allowance (if you have a disability) and utility discounts. A great place to start if you believe you could be entitled to any of the above is with Citizen’s Advice who can also advise on any charitable organisations that may be able to help.
0 Comments